A Year Gone By In The Life Of A Newbie Internet Marketer

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Well it’s 2009

Man, life’s gonna be fine

‘Cause I’m gonna be an internet marketing star.

No experience needed-just whip out the card.

Press a few magic money buttons – Who said this was gonna be hard?

What’ll I buy first?

A yacht, a house, or maybe a car…

I double opted-in to every marketer’s mailing list

And downloaded all their free offers – Hey, how could I resist?

Then canceled or returned the real product before thirty days – No one got pissed.

My first system held the secrets that the Gurus didn’t want you to know.

Well, the bottom line on that was just a negative cash flow.

Next came my nemesis Google, to ambush, slash and finally assassinate –

Then emerged Clickbank, for me to dominate.

I bought a Black Hat system to enter Google’s back door.

Then bought another after a month, ‘cause the techniques didn’t work anymore.

I flipped tons of sites like my burgers at BK,

And had membership sites for folks to subscribe to every damn day.

I stomped all over the net,

Only to get further in debt –

But still got my plate in hand to feast at the newbie buffet.

Rich or not, one guy was just a jerk –

‘Cause his system totally didn’t work.

Next, I tried following a fox.

But he expected me to do some work – Not like that business in a box.

I tried all the tricks to get great SEO –

Spent all my money on adwords to get the traffic to flow.

So being broke, just marketed my charms in that social web 2.0.

Then it was time to just sit back and watch my bank account explode

‘Cause all the JVs and Affiliates would bring me the money payload.

I tried controlling the masses,

And then took those PPC classes,

But could never quite break the code.

I submitted articles for every niche –

And added to my pages every adsense pitch –

Had a blueprint to make commissions ‘till I was blue.

And with those cannons, oh baby, I figured I’d be blowing cash out the wazoo.

I always figured the next one was gonna be “it” for sure,

And soon, I’d be on the cover of Entrepreneur –

Not a day went by, that there wasn’t a system to try that was new.

But now, 2009 is almost over and nothing’s gone according to plan.

Looks like I gotta’ keep driving my ten year old rusted van.

What once were fantasies of excesses and extremes,

Have succumbed to the reality of a newbie’s broken dreams.

Now there’s a newcomer on the scene – I hope what he teaches turns out to be true.

I’ve got one last chance – Oh, I promise I’ll do everything that he tells me to do.

Just show me the way – No BS, no fluff –

Just give me all the right moves, that money makin’ stuff!

But then what he actually told me

At first I couldn’t understand –

How will this “insight” make me money, fist over hand?

He said, “I am no Guru,

Only what you perceive to be.

Perhaps some day people will say the word “Guru” to you

Instead of to me.

For there is no ‘right way’ to do it all –

You create your own reality,

And whether you will rise or fall.

You are the king of your destiny.

The master of your fate.

And for what is uniquely yours to offer,

The world lies in wait.

You must give more than you receive,

And in yourself believe –

And only then will come into play, The Law of Attraction.

For all books you may read or courses you may take,

In terms of your success –

They are only a small fraction.

For it all means absolutely nothing – if you don’t ever take action”.

© Denis Caron 2009

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